Am I Living My Purpose or Am I Just Doing?

Every morning between 7:30 and 8 am, I refill the bird feeders in anticipation of the day’s wildlife activity.  With the onset of autumn, the days grow shorter and I now find myself performing my routine while it is still dark. It doesn’t seem that long ago that the sun rose early and set late into the evening.

Until this past weekend leaves in the backyard still glowed with various shades of green. Then overnight, as if someone spray painted the leaves, the maples had turned into an impressionistic painting of yellows, reds and oranges.

The families of deer that have passed through my yard all summer have changed as well. The spots have now disappeared and like the adults, the fawns’ coats have grown thick and dark. The bucks’ velvet stumps have been stripped away, leaving behind hard wooden antlers.

Why is it that I cannot see these changes as they occur? I consider myself an observant person. I’m adept at reading body language, identifying nuances in behavior among friends and colleagues. Yet I completely missed the transition from summer to fall.  Is it because it is such a gradual process that the mind cannot absorb and comprehend that minute a change? Or is it denial because I love the summer months so much that the onset of colder weather is too much to embrace? Or is it simply that I have multi-tasked myself so much that I miss the nuances that bring richness to everyday life?

I think all of us are guilty of trying to do too much. In a world where technology allows for instant gratification and action, we have become a society of doers not beings. When was the last time you had a conversation with your friends without the interruption of cell phones and computers? Drove a car without the radio blaring? Spent time with your family doing something other than watch television?

Looking back on the number of opportunities I have passed up because I was too busy, it begs the question: am I living my purpose or am I just doing? Only I can answer that question for it is a reflection of who I am and what is important to me.

So I ask you, are you living your life with meaning and purpose or are you just doing?